Jokes about men

Tonight's crowd were a bit quiet, and what with yesterday's tandem and bendering extravaganza I hadn't rehearsed as dutifully as I should have. It was hard to get the crowd involved, so I'd prod them for a response and then not press it - nobody walked out though and I thought I had one or two decent bits:

Men are like bras; you have to tie them up from behind. And I find I usually need both my hands to get them off.

Ah, sexual stereotypes, light bondage and some confusion about my sexuality, all at once! That was extra value for the audience, surely?

I'm enjoying having an unreliable lift in my building. If it breaks down and I'm not in it, I get some decent exercise. And if it breaks down and I am in it, maybe I'll end up in a confined space with a startled woman. Or a man in overalls. I'm not fussy these days.

I suppose that latter material will have to be filed under "jokes only suitable for the Associated Lift & Elevator Repairman Association of Hong Kong" and that only barely.

Still, if nothing else, that prevents anyone thinking I'm a pale imitation of Stewart Lee. Maybe now I'm a pallid facsimile of Benny Hill's warm-up man.