A corporate day out

Today was another day of fierce airconditioning in tropical Penang. In the morning it was chilly, in the afternoon I was struggling to keep my eyes open and not fall off my chair.

This was a shame, as most of the presentations today were good; they weren't ones where I wanted to lose consciousness and slide below the table. But occasionally we'd get up and move around, which kept me close to being alert.

This afternoon we had mandatory fun, which consisted of making a car from sheets of cardboard, and then dinner. This was a shame, because I wanted to sleep and read Charles Dickens, instead of which I had to eat free food and drink beer without paying for it. Such is life.

To entertain us, there was a series of traditional Malaysian dancing and music. Assuming Malaysian dancing traditions consist of wearing ostrich feathers and waving your arms to techno, while I guy from the Punjab with a corkscrew perm of orange hair bellows 80s rock "classics" and encouraged us to "give it up". It might be a horrible, soulless experience to try to entertain uninterested corporate folk out on a jolly, but it's also a horrible experience to be trying to eat some sauteed potatoes while a berk in a black shirt is massacreing an Albert Hammond song.

I mean, the closest I've ever been to Albert Hammond before is Half Man Half Biscuit's Albert Hammond Bootleg, and that wasn't the greatest experience of my life. And although there was karaoke afterwards, they had no Motorhead - where's the fun in that.

So this hasn't been the most cultural experience of my life, sat in a resort, not having much to eat and then listening to a terrible band. So much for Penang's wonderful food - or I'll have to wait until next time.