Can't see the Forest for the trees

Tonight I went for a run, and something went a bit mental with my heart rate monitor.

Well, that's the optimistic interpretation for it showing a reading of 190 bpm. The pessimistic interpretation is that I'm about to keel over in a hotel gym from a massive cardiac arrest. Well, I suppose the optimistic interpretation should be that I'm capable of ludicrous exertion.

Or that I've got a generous life insurance policy, and my wife's about to be a bit more comfortable.

Tonight, after I'd finished sweating, we went to Forest, a faintly ridiculous bar that specialises in karaoke, darts and rainforest-themed decor.

And buckets of cheap beer, which is why I have to shut one eye to see straight.

We also moved into our penthouse today. Well, we're on the top floor of the building, whatever that counts for. We're also only five minutes from the karaoke, darts and rainforest emporium, so all my hopes of sobriety are up in smoke.

On the positive side I'll get good at darts, or singing.

Or I'll be dead and my wife will be richer. What could possibly go wrong?