Wednesday, May 23, 2012


Another day passed in a daze. I've been going to bed too late, and then getting up and rushing out of the door too early, because I've had early morning phone calls with the States and we can't get the telephone in our flat to work properly. That means I don't have my full four-part breakfast, which in turn means my brain and body are devoid of energy and instead of being ready to face the day after my call is over, I'm slumped face down on my desk, unable to contemplate productive thought. Since my job consists for the most part of thinking (and then swearing at my computer) this is bothersome.  Then, after a hard day struggling, I get home, fall asleep on the sofa, and then wake an hour later only to stay up far too late, trying to achieve something in my life.  When will this cycle ever end?

On Saturday night, when I do a half marathon and then go to sleep for eighteen hours.  Ah, simplicity, you are a pair of running shoes and some disgusting energy gel.

This evening, having been presented with a free suitcase for working for the same company for five years (they were polite enough to not mention the time I spent drooling into my keyboard), I skipped merrily home, and stopped off at the sausage kiosk for a pretzel. Finding a five dollar bill in my wallet, I went a bit crazy and ordered two pretzels (yeah, I know how to liven up a Wednesday evening) and then rushed back to the flat as fast as I could.

I've discovered something new. Hot pretzels with salt crystals on them are all well and good, but cover them in Dijon mustard and you have something almost indescribably good. It makes me sad to think of all the times the Germans and the French fought one another, when they should have come together with the perfect combination of mustard and bread-product.

I wonder if a baguette dipped in Seft or Currywurst sauce would taste as good. Or, if we're going to go for World War II Axis food, how about a croissant coated liberally with wasabi? It's the future, I tell you, just as much as it's the past.

Having eaten two pretzels and as much mustard as it's possible to cover them in, I passed out and woke up an hour later, strange marks from a pillow all over my face and my right arm numb from where I'd been lying on it, and then hauled myself off to run for two miles to attempt to compensate for the abuse of food I'd committed.

Also, to consider what other foodstuffs would go well with mustard. What will not go well with mustard? Or will my Coleman's mustard gelato be a frankenfood I can animate soon?


Post a Comment