Sunday, May 01, 2011


After a languid day's riding (about 45 minutes in the saddle and maybe six times as long in the van, driving between trails) I got home and found the majority of a cockroach in the shower. Either it had self-destructed or the cat had finally decided to make herself useful by hunting down the invertebrate portion of the household.

I scooped up the remains and dropped them in the toilet, which of course still won't flush, even though the lift is now working. Life is very complicated in our apartment building. Unless you're a partially dismembered cockroach, in which case all you get to do is twitch feebly and wait for somebody to dispose of you in their lavatory.

But let's not get too philosophical. After all, it's Sunday, and I'm off to see Thor soon, which (from the look of the trailer) has lots of explosions and a giant in a rubber suit shooting lasers out of his face. Apparently it's much better than that sounds, although not if you watch it in 3D, because then it's too dark.

I think we're watching it in 3D.

Never mind; we could be watching Sex & Zen 3D instead, the first Hong Kong porn movie in decades, the first Hong Kong porn movie shot in three dimensions, etc etc, first first first. From what people tell me, it's not all that great: perhaps the porn directors of Hong Kong were out of practise after their long hiatus. The 3D is limited to explosions and bullets flying towards your face, and the rumpy-pumpy is strictly low-grade, no more than you'd see in the average Hollywood flick.

There is an exploding hemaphrodite. I don't know if that's meant to be a selling point, or a negative, or irrelevant to the plot, but what I did hear is that as far as the filmmakers were concerned, casting a hemaphrodite meant getting in a bint and dubbing her with a man's voice, once again showing Hong Kong's great sensitivity to issues of gender and sexual identity.

I suppose exploding hemaphrodites are lacking from most Hollywood films. And Sex & Zen 3D made more money in its first week than Avatar did, so you have to worry that this might be identified as the secret sauce for all future 3D films screened in the SAR. Next thing you know, it will be thermonuclear lesbians, or transvestite fragmentation grenades. What else does Hong Kong think is sexually abnormal that could be combined with something dangerous?


Post a Comment