Getting The Fear

Today has been a series of terrors for me. It started with the trilling of the telephone in my room, striking fear into my heart. But I shouldn't have been scared; it wasn't the end of the world, just time to get out of bed. Which is sort of the end of the world, but with fresh pancakes.

Next, I had to panic about forgetting my badge to get into the office building; that was solved by borrowing my colleague's badge to get in, although this soon became difficult, as every time I went to a meeting there were at least two security checks I had to go to, or more if I got lost and exitted the lift on the wrong floor.

Then I printed out my Jetblue boarding pass, only to find the word STANDBY printed across the top, and no seat assignment. Will I get on the plane? Will I find myself sat in Sea-Tac when I should be eating brunch in New York with my wife and all my friends? Is there even a plane at all?

Somehow I skipped lunch, which was another error. As the morning's caffeine high faded away, I grew sad and gloomy. The sky was blue, the sun was warm, but joy leaked out of my life as climate controlled air washed across me. I began to feel my entire life would be meaningless, mere wanderings through pastel coloured corridors.

Then I left the office, and couldn't find my passport, having somehow managed to stuff it into my bag between two different layers. The adrenalin and dread that spurted through me soon dissipated; a shot of espresso was nothing to fight against this tidal wave of fright and worry.

Now I'm in a taxi, making its plodding way down the highway from Bellevue to the airport, worrying, worrying, worrying. I think when I get to the airport I'll have a pie. Or some valium. Or a pie made entirely from valium.