Things I've Seen At Geneva Airport

After a final day in Geneva, eating rubbery croissants and then fine pizza (strangely, Geneva seems filled with pizzerias) we took the train back to the airport. I checked in behind a strange looking chap: a grey bird's nest of scruffy hair atop his head, Chanel glasses that advertised themselves with centimetre high lettering in glittery Swarovski crystals. And then a baggy old t-shirt half tucked into some tracksuit bottoms that might have been pulled out of a ditch. I'm just saying it was a bit of an odd look for somebody, and it's not like I don't wander around being malcoordinated.

Jokes about volcanoes, jokes about vegetarians

I saw Richard Herring's joke on Twitter that the true victims of the Icelandic volcano are terrorists. How will they get their 72 virgins without any planes to blow up? I'd retweet it, but it's too long to do that without making it appear that I AM THE COMEDY GENIUS and all must submit. Instead, I'll stick to jokes about vegetarians.

Up in the air

Clooney never had to deal with this.

The enormous plume of ash continues to spew across Europe, as those wily Icelanders wreak havoc on the hated bankers of Europe/flee in terror from their exploding glacier.

Volcanoes

Oops.  There's been a huge eruption in Iceland and now there's a cloud of smoke and ash so big that all the flights out of the UK have been cancelled.

Or that's what they're saying.  It's abundantly clear that the Icelanders have done this to get back at Europeans trying to make them repay debts built up in the 2008 crash.  They're just trying to punish us by turning the sky black.